I guess I could be described as an English Language geek (‘bore’ even) when it comes to the use of superlative descriptions. The kids (40/50 year olds that is) talk about ‘awesome’ this and ‘fabulous’ that in virtually every sentence. ‘We’ve just been out for ‘fish and chips’ we say. ‘AWESOME!’ they reply. This generation are going to have to invent a whole new set of superlatives when they’ve finally degraded all the ones we currently have.

So I was a touch cynical when told we were being taken to a ‘Christmas Spectacular’. Not cynical about the event that is, just cynical about it’s description. Are they joining in with the general debasement of our beautifully refined English language, and do they really mean that it’s just a ‘VERY GOOD Christmas Show’? But gladly (or ‘awesomely’ I could even say) it turns out I was wrong to be sceptical. It is a truly, beautiful, inspirational, Christmas Spectacular. A Right Royal Variety Performance for the proletariat, bigger, better, and more inspiring than the London Palladium version.

But I’m jumping ahead.

The experience starts the day before when we arrive at the photogenic Kings Lynn station, and meet Maggie and Richard in their shiny new red car. They have become accustomed (resigned?) over the years to collecting us from various railway hubs and generally ferrying us around (for which, I have to say, we are tremendously appreciative). In the past it’s been Retford, Lowestoft, Newark, Kings Lynn, …….and we are currently planning the next one, (which they don’t know about yet)…. probably Berlin Hauptbahnhof.

We take the scenic route along the north Norfolk coast via the picturesque towns of Wells-next-the-Sea and Blakeney, and the Sandringham Estate, to our hotel – ‘The Pheasant’ at Kelling.

After our customary gin and tonics to kickstart the evening we make our way into dinner. Ahead of us, the head waiter is herding a coachload of pensioners from bar to dining room and is sounding somewhat officious with his East European accent. But chatting to him later we are pleased to discover his sense of humour. We ask him where he comes from and he replies “from Cromer”. We have to interrogate further to find that he is from Estonia. We ask him how long he as been here. “Since 3:30” he says. And so it goes on.

It’s the following day and we drive to Holt through fine-looking villages with well-kept houses built of the traditional limestone and flint – and in some cases pebbles from the beach. This part of Norfolk has an air of affluence about it – it’s easy to understand why it’s in vogue as the place to visit.

Our drive takes us to Holt, a very traditional Norfolk town with high-end shops selling top-notch fashion. There’s even a thriving department store that you can get lost in, full of eye-catching goods with a ‘want to buy’ feeling about them. Then it’s a coffee at the local café followed by an attempt to post a couple of letters. There’s a ‘banking hub’ (first time I’ve come across one) that also has a ‘Post Office’ sign. But to post a letter they direct us to a post box a hundred yards down the road!

Then it’s off to the main event – ‘The Thursford Christmas Spectacular’. We had not heard of it before but it seems like everyone else in the country had. There’s a huge car park filling rapidly as we arrive and coaches from far and wide. It’s Maggie and Richards’ fourth visit and the forty-eighth year of the event. It was started by a local farmer who wanted to provide some seasonal entertainment for his farmhands. It grew from there and is now held in a purpose-built theatre seating 1500 people. The production involves 200 people including the creative teams, singers, dancers, musicians, speciality acts, and technicians.

The stage must be at least four times wider than a typical stage and even includes, to one side, a fairground Venetian Gondola Switchback ride, and centre-stage the Mighty Wurlitzer Organ. The show itself has everything – traditional pipers, superb singers, beautiful dancers, an entertaining comedian, an amazing organist who’s every hand and foot action is captured on the big screen, a frighteningly precarious yet artistic hand balancing act, and a jump rope troupe that has us all marvelling at how they do it.

But what I don’t think any of us were really prepared for is the deep emotion that the show somehow generates. It probably starts with the pipers. The emotion further builds up with the Cyr wheel ballet-like act so beautifully performed by the young German couple, holding us all captivated. By the time the full orchestra and singers join together in ‘Nessun Dorma’, spreading around the audience so that no-one is further than a few feet from the singers, it’s hard to hold back the tears. Don’t know exactly why – it’s just such a simply powerful and emotional experience, a vast array of beautiful talent coming together in one place, touching everyone with its pure perfection.

Add to all this the thousands of Christmas decorations, inside and outside, so many that it’s easy to miss the many marvels and intricacies. What an amazing show – you could almost say ‘awesome’! Did we leave it feeling uplifted – with a glow in our hearts and a smile on our faces? We most certainly did!

It’s the following morning and we have to be in Yorkshire so there’s a rush to get our breakfast order in before the waitress starts the rounds of the coach party. Then it’s back to Maggie and Richard delivering us safely to the next railway hub of our life’s rich journey. On the way I recall one of the stories the compere told us at Thursford. An ageing American is writing about how to live a long and happy life. “You need a good woman to help with all the household chores. You need a good woman to trust and share your feelings with. You need a woman who is a good cook. You need a good woman to share some loving with. And finally, it’s important that these four women never meet!”